Cayenne Pepper

A lot of people suggested I sprinkle cayenne pepper outside to get rid of the squirrel and it reminded me of a funny, albeit gross, story. Consider yourself warned.

If you read Save Karyn, you might remember that my old roommate Scott had a Jack Russell Terrier named Veda.

When we first moved in together, Veda was a puppy and was completely out of control. At the time, I only had Elvis, and Veda developed a habit of rummaging through his litter box and eating his poop. (As gross as this is, it's quite common for puppies to do.)

As you can imagine, Scott and I weren't exactly excited about Veda's new habit, but no matter what we did, we couldn't break her of it. We moved the litter box, put a lid on it, added a door... but somehow she'd always figure out a way to get inside.

After a while, someone suggested that we douse Elvis' poop with Tabasco sauce, so we decided to give it a try. After waiting for Elvis to "make a fresh one," we uncovered it with the scooper and gave it a good douse. As terrible as it is, we then led Veda to the litter box and encouraged her to dive in.

Within seconds, Veda found the spicy piece of poop and completely devoured it. When she finished, with her lips-a-smackin', rather than freak out and run the other way because her mouth was now probably on fire, she instead looked back at the litter box and dove inside for seconds. I mean, the Tabasco sauce didn't even phase her. She was like, "Mmmm, sauce!"

Anyway, sorry for the gross story, but I had to share it. Oh, and as for Veda, she eventually stopped eating Elvis' poop. When she moved out.

Squirrel Comments

As with the monkey comments, there were a couple hilarious squirrel ones as well.

From Lindz...

I cannot believe you got a picture of the little bastardo. My dad has a similar battle ensuing with moles in his yard. Has for years. He peed down the holes, waiting outside of them with a pitchfork (we live in the burbs mind you - not in the country), placed juicy fruit gum in the holes, flooded them, put hair in there, traps... you name it. Perhaps I should write about it!? Good luck.

Lindz, I don't know you or your dad, but the thought of a grown man standing in a yard with a pitchfork and some Juicy Fruit had me laughing out loud. It's all very Caddyshack. Oh, and what's with the hair?


From Tara...

When I was in college I use to hand feed my "pet" squirrel. I would push the screen out and hand him a peanut. It was all fun and games until the squirrel started crawling up the screen and shaking it violently until I gave him a peanut. Eventually he started to chew a hole through the screen and my roommate told me I had to stop. Your story reminded me of mine...

"...shaking it violently." I can't stop laughing.

The Squirrel

That damn squirrel is back again.

I say "damn" because I evicted the little b*stard a few weeks ago when I saw that he chewed a hole through my screen. Now here it is, 70 degrees outside, and I can't open the window because I know he'll try to move right in.

I read on the internet that a way to get rid of squirrels is to spray coyote urine wherever you don't want them. Now, where in the hell am I supposed to get that? As you can imagine we don't have many coyotes here in Brooklyn, and even if we did, I can't see myself sticking a dixie cup between its legs and asking for a sample.

I could try to collect some pee pee from Elvis, but I can't imagine he'd be too happy about it.



Ever since the vet used a syringe to do it, he won't let me near the area anyway. (Not that I try to go there often, but you know what I mean... he's made it very clear that it's off-limits.)

Anywho, my sister told me to try sprinkling his pee-peed cat litter out there, which isn't a bad idea. I think I'm going to give it a try. If that doesn't work, I swear to God, I'm going to get out there myself and christen the place. That squirrel is going down.

Look Who's Back!

Look who's back!





It's Sammy the squirrel!

I was so excited when I saw him this morning. He was sleeping in a little ball, but then he woke up because listen to what happened!

Another squirrel came along and I can't figure out if Sammy likes him or not. (This one is definitely a boy because I saw something that looked like a weenie on the lower part of his belly.)

He was hanging around on the fire escape for a while...




...and then he peeked his head inside the door and woke Sammy up.




Rather than invite him in, Sammy started squeaking and making noise—it was a regular squirrel showdown.




The second squirrel eventually backed off so now Sammy's sleeping again, but he's got one eye open watching out for this other guy.

So now I'm curious about squirrel behavior. Why didn't Sammy let the other guy share his bed? Are squirrels territorial? Or, do you think they know each other and maybe the other guy is watching out for Sammy while he gets a good nap in? Will they take turns? Will Sammy let the other dude get some shut-eye after he gets his?

So many questions and not nearly enough motivation to search for the answers on the internet.

You know what I just realized, though? This is how it begins. This is how seemingly normal people become crazy squirrel people. (Or crazy cat people.) You are witnessing what could be the beginning of the end for me.

UPDATE: Omg, the other squirrel walked on Sammy's side of the fire escape door and Sammy lunged forward and attacked him. They definitely aren't friends.

I'm so angry I didn't have my camera ready to capture it. I'm getting out the video camera.

UPDATE 2: Oh wow... These two have had like four more fights, but I can't get the video camera working fast enough when I realize it.

Laura asked what Beverly and Elvis have been doing this whole time, so I'll tell you: Beverly has been sleeping on the bed and Elvis has been humping a t-shirt of mine in the corner. They really know how to defend their turf.

John Adams and My Pet Squirrel

So I fell asleep during the second episode of the John Adams miniseries. Apparently, that's how exciting I find the Declaration of Independence to be. Oh, I'm kidding... the Declaration of Independence is a real hoot. Kids, pay attention in school. I was just tired, that's all. I'm going to re-watch the episode tonight.

Anywho, when I woke up this morning, Sammy the squirrel was gone. (Thank you, Kristen, for suggesting the unisex name that stuck.) To be honest, I was a little sad to see his bed of leaves abandoned, and I didn't disturb it because I'm secretly hoping the little sucker will come back. I was looking forward to helping him give birth and rearing the children. I imagined myself feeding them nuts, giving them baths, teaching them how to water ski. But there won't be any of that now, unless he comes back.

Oh well... happy Sunday!

And now, for your viewing pleasure... Twiggy the Water Skiing Squirrel:

My New Pet Squirrel

There's a squirrel sleeping in my window sill. He's been there since morning.

Elvis first spotted him around nine o'clock or so, building a bed out of leaves.

Initially I didn't want him there (because you know he's probably got fleas, and also, squirrels are gross, like rats with tails), so I knocked on the window a few times hoping to scare him away. But the little bugger is stubborn and wouldn't leave, so I decided to let him get a good nap in.

He's been sleeping now for about ten hours and I'm not sure if I should wake him. Elvis is voting "yes" and wants him out, now.

Anywho... During the course of the day, we've made eye contact a few times and he seems kind of sweet. He's little, too, like maybe a baby. Also, although I can't be certain, I think he's a boy. I just get that feeling from him. I've been calling him "Buddy" but he needs a real name. Any suggestions?