Happy New Year!

May we all be so lucky as to have some handsome devil utter the following words to us at some point tonight...


Hee hee!

Stay safe!

There Will Be Blood

Watching this tonight.

The best movie performance so far this century? No contest. There's Daniel Day-Lewis' awe-inspiring turn as a greedy oilman in "There Will Be Blood," and there is everyone else."

Source: NY Post

UPDATE: I feel asleep. It's like 2-1/2 hours long! Oy. I'll watch it again in the next couple days and let you know.

Laura's Hike

And people worry about New York being dangerous...

Elvis Has Left The Building (The Brooklyn One)

Someone said they feel badly for Elvis because he never gets to come to my sister's house in Connecticut. (In the comments section of this post.)

Well, I just want to let everyone know that he's here with me right now. I decided to stay through New Year's, so I went all the way back home to Brooklyn a couple days ago to get him because I felt badly about leaving him alone for so long. (The cat sitter only stays a half-hour or so and he needs WAY more love than that.) I'm such a good Mommy.

He's upstairs in my room right now, probably sitting on a shirt of mine, smelling it, no doubt thinking, she's so super-cool. Elvis is obsessed with me. Like sometimes I awake in the middle of the night to find him sitting on my pillow, staring at me, which is WAY freakier than Beverly doing it every once in a while from across the room because he's like an inch from my face. Love that little bugger.

Beverly Loves Me

Beverly has been sitting on the couch at my sister's house staring at me intently for the past hour.

Although I can't be certain, I'm pretty sure she's thinking about how much she loves me.

Ha ha... this reminds me of this video:

Boo!

I'm sorry... Reuter's picked their favorite pictures of the year and this was one of them. A Shhynx cat. It scared the sh*t out of me.

Funky, Funky Christmas

The worst Christmas song, ever.

The boy band should never be resurrected for this very reason.

Baby Blender

It's a baby in a blender!


No, it's not. It's a Dutch-designed baby bath called the "Tummy Tub." Really.

It still makes me want a margarita, though.

Via: Inspire me, now! (A great site.)

Badly Drawn Boy

Click here, push play, close your eyes, and take a few minutes to think happy thoughts.

Colorstrology

My birthday (9/24) color is Cornflower Blue.


What's yours?

Presents

More details on my Christmas tomorrow. Until then, here's a GREAT article from the New York Times.

TAKE IT IN THE SPIRIT INTENDED
The Sweater Only a Mom (and Analyst) Could Love
By MATTHEW WEINER

Getting a gift is like being set up on a blind date — like it or not, your friend or family member is sending you a message about what they think you want, what you deserve and, on some level, who they think you are...

Merry Christmas

I found this book tonight in the room I stay in at my sister's house:

"Sisters: Essays by Carol Saline, Photographs by Sharon J. Wohlmuth"

I remember giving it to her years ago, but I totally forgot that I put the following on the inside of the book:


The card says:

The love that moves the sun and other stars."

And when you open it up...

(You are.)

It was dated on her birthday, 1995.

I love my sissy.

Merry Christmas.

Jack And Nora...

Don't like Santa.

No Country For Old Men

I'm at my sister's house right now and I bought my stack of movies with me. Last night we watched "No Country For Old Men."

Before we watched it, I said to my sister, "There's something about this movie that makes people really angry. I don't know what it is, but whenever I hear people talk about it, they get really worked up."

Well, having watched it, I now know what makes people so angry. But I'm not telling you! You'll have to see it for yourself to find out.

I will say, though, that the movie was great, filled with suspense. And that Javier Bardem is the creepiest mf-er you'll ever see on the big screen.


Even with his bad hair. My sister was like, "Is it just me, or does he look like Neil Diamond?"


It's not just her.

Juno

I just finished watching "Juno." It was so funny and witty, and that Ellen Page was just FABULOUS in it. I cried at the end.

Mark is seeing it this weekend. I told him that she dies during childbirth at the end just to f*ck with him. (She doesn't.) I was like, "It's so out of left-field, you don't expect it to happen at all and then BAM... she's gone." He kind of sat there for a second like, "What?" but then was like, "No, she doesn't!"

Fat Bastard

I just bought a wine called "Fat Bastard."


I kind of had to buy it because of the name. (Like La Poussie.)

The back of the bottle says...

The Origin of the Fat bastard

Good friends Thierry (renowned French winemaker) & Guy (British wine industry rebel) created Fat bastard almost by accident. It started out as an experiment Thierry had been doing in the back of his cellar, leaving a barrel ‘on the lees’ (yeast cells.) He didn’t know what to expect, but when the friends tried the wine Thierry exclaimed...

“Now zat iz what you call eh Phet bast-ard!”
(read with a strong French accent.)

This very British expression perfectly described the wine’s wonderful color and round, rich palate so that’s what they called it.

I bought the Shiraz. I'm going to have a glass now. I'll let you know how it is.

UPDATE: Blah, blah, blah. It like has no taste, no aroma, nothing. I taste it for a split second when it hits my tongue and then it's gone. It was $14; don't waste your money.

Hannah Montana

I'm watching Miley Cyrus on Oprah right now. (DVR... Yeah, baby!) What I want to know is... do you think she has lip injections?


The top one is the one I'm a little suspicious about.

Hmmm....

Ugh. She just called Oprah "Girl," like, "Hey, girl!" They didn't show O's reaction—I can't imagine she was thrilled. For one, Oprah ain't your girl, Miley. She's older than you, your superior, and she's freakin' OPRAH!, for cripe's sake. And two, you kind of said it with a hip-hoppy twang. (Hey, I'm just saying...)

I don't mean to knock her. She's young and successful—more power to her—but Miley, Oprah isn't your girl!

I will say that I just love her dad, Billy Ray. He seems so nice with his little butt-cut and highlights.


He talked about something Thomas Edison said about failure. Every time you fail, you're one step closer to finding success. Like, you've figured out another way that won't work, so you're that much closer to finding the way that will.

My Lucite Chair And Bench

A nice girl named Ali asked me where I got the chair Bev is sitting on in this picture:


I bought it a few years ago at an antique store (which is now closed) in my neighborhood. At the time, the seat was a really ugly yellow vinyl so I recovered it all by myself using some gray velvet I bought at a fabric store. It was so easy to do... I simply put the velvet right over the old vinyl and secured it using a staple gun and staples. I also used the same technique to recover an antique lucite bench I had with an ugly turquoise vinyl cushion.

I didn't take official before pictures of the two pieces, but found them in the background of some other pics. Here's the chair before and after:

And here's the bench:



My recovering job is by no means professional, but it looks pretty good, right?

A PSA From Me

Instant message conversation, earlier today...

--- Start conversation ---

"Are you talking to Beverly about Jamie Lynn's
pregnancy and making sure she understands
it's not okay to get pregnant so young?"

"Beverly doesn't have sex."

"That's what you think."

"Are you talking to Gertie? How about Brisco?
It's not just the girl's responsibility, you know."

"They both know to use protection."

"Yeah, right."

--- End conversation ---

Please talk to your little ones about sex.

Morpheus

I made the Jack/Matt Damon morph in the previous post using the free trial version of a program called Morpheus. Check it out; it's pretty cool.

My Nephew Jack

I think my nephew Jack looks like Matt Damon.

It's the eyes.

DVR

So this DVR I got is going to be the end of me. I'm never going to leave my apartment. I record everything. EVERYTHING. Things I don't even normally watch. Like Intervention. I recorded it a few nights ago and now I have a crush on this 25-year-old OxyContin addict named Ryan. Did anyone else watch?

Beverly's House

Wet

It's raining outside.


I'm going to tell you the story behind this in a minute.

UPDATE: Okay, I'm back. You might not be able to tell, but I'm soaked in the picture above (like, completely through my coat, down to my undies.) I walked in the rain to the Jacques Torres Chocolate store in DUMBO (a neighborhood in Brooklyn that's not too far away from me) because my friend Mark had to have this thing called "Wicked Hot Chocolate" for a ski trip he's taking to Tahoe after Christmas.

"Wicked Hot Chocolate" is hot chocolate made with allspice, cinnamon, ground, sweet ancho chili peppers, and smoked, ground chipotle chili peppers. It's supposed to be delicious and Mark is longing to drink it by the fire. (He's so gay.)

Now, you might ask why I'd walk somewhere in the rain (20 minutes each way) for a friend who didn't let me take a bath in his hotel room. Well, the answer to that is because he bought me this cute handbag for Christmas. Thank you, Mark! I've almost forgiven you.

BTW, Jacques Torres' chocolate store was on Martha before. It's right here in Brooklyn and the stuff they make is nummy. Check out their website.

My Dream

Last night I had the most terrible dream.

I dreamt I let Beverly off of her leash at a park and she ran away onto an airplane or train or something in the distance and disappeared. I was on the train/plane thing searching for her, but she was no where to be found. It was terrible because the feeling was that she was dead. My little muffin. When I woke up, I just kissed her and kissed her and kissed her. I was so happy she was safe.

I always try to analyze my dreams and figure out what they mean. With regards to this one, it was kind of like that movie "Flightplan," which I saw last week. I think I thought about the movie at some point yesterday (because it was stupid, stupid, stupid and I was thinking of writing a post about it) so maybe that's why I dreamt this. I dunno.

Schrute

I like you, too, Schrute.

My Christmas Present

My friend Mark says he's getting me this for Christmas.

Bungee Jumping

I just watched Ann Curry bungee jump on the Today show (I got my TV!) and I want to do it!

I can't believe I've never been bungee jumping or sky diving. What a poser.

This year, instead of making fluffy new year resolutions (be nicer, eat less, exercise more), I'm going to make bolder, more concrete ones... a definitive list of things to do by year-end. On that list...

1. Bungee jump
2. 
   

UPDATE: Oh, Nick Lachey is on! You all know how much I like him. He's talking about this show he's on tonight, Clash of the Choirs. Neat concept. I'm going to record it. (I had to get a new cable box with my new TV, so I finally got a DVR.)

UPDATE 3: Gloria Estefan is singing now. She has terrible red hair.

It's Bath Time!

Not for me... but for Beverly.

She hates baths.

Nervously panting while getting a haircut

All lathered up...

...and hating every second of it

Post bath, trembling in a towel


Getting her hair brushed

Elvis shows up during the dreaded blow-dry—not to show Bev support—but to get some of that dryer heat.

Tada! A clean Yorkie!

Oh The Weather Outside Is...

So freaking disgusting.

Sooo... the big Nor'easter is supposed to hit today. I think. But I don't have a TV yet so I'm not sure. All I know is that it started hailing at 10am and has been raining ever since. I wish it were just a bit colder and all this rain would turn to snow, because then I'd live in a winter wonderland!

I've been go-go-go all day. I started doing laundry at seven o'clock, went to the doctor at noon, returned my dress to Bloomingdales (the one I didn't wear), did a little Christmas shopping, and now I'm off to a holiday party!

This is my hope: I hope when I leave the party tonight that the rain will have turned to snow and the whole city is white.

Cheers!

Things That Bother Me

Things that bother me:

16. Cords, cables and the like. Everything has one. And they always get all tangled up.
    
17. The interactive voice response lady who seems to have lent her voice every business and help line I call, including (but not limited to) the cable company, the electric company, the bank, and every major airline. No matter how clearly I speak she cannot understand me. Also, if she asks, "Are you still there?" one more time, I'm going to hunt her down and hurt her. I hate you, IVR lady. I really, really hate you.
    

(This is an ongoing list.)

Yorkies

Sometimes when I can't sleep, I search for Yorkie videos on YouTube.

Aww shoot... did I seriously just admit that?

Some of them are so good, though! Like, you have to see this one. Boots the Yorkie died, so his owner made a video about him. Grab a tissue.

Now, I don't know about you, but I have tears streaming down my face right now. I mean, I can't even begin to imagine the day something happens to Elvis or Bev. I'm so making one of these videos for them...

Bev & Mommy

Christmas Tree Shopping In Brooklyn

Are your Christmas tree salesman as fabulous as mine?


Let's take a closer look and find out.

First, let's admire their beautiful sign:


Why is there a town car on it? Does Santa drive one now? Did he ditch his sleigh for a set of wheels?

Next, let's take a look at the beautiful decorations:

Let's get closer:


Is that baby Jesus? What's he doing in Brooklyn? He's got such nice eyebrows.

Finally, what do your salesmen do to stay warm? Bundle up by a space heater? Sip hot cocoa? Drink warm cider?


Mine drink beer. From a can. In a bag.

Merry Christmas!

Ki Sushi

Waiting for a table at my favorite new sushi restaurant in my neighborhood, Ki Sushi.

City Of God

(It's movie day here.)

Yesterday I watched "City of God," a 2002 Academy-Award nominated Brazilian film about youth gangs that took over Rio de Janeiro slums in the late 60s to mid-eighties.

I've been wanting to see this movie for a while (it's always peering out at me from a shelf in this skeevy video rental store in my 'hood), mostly because of the hype that surrounds it. Roger Ebert said it's "one of the best films you will ever see"; Time magazine placed it on their list of the 100 best films of all-time; IMDb ranked it at #19 on their top 250 films list—the acclaim goes on and on.

After watching the movie, I have to say that it lived up to the hype... kind of. I mean, I enjoyed it, but I don't know if I'd put it on my top 10 or even my top 50 list. It's a little too violent for my liking, I think.

But the violence is also what made it so good. The world that's depicted in the film is beyond me, beyond my comprehension. If you saw "Blood Diamond," it has a lot of the same shocking visuals in it (little boys holding guns, killing each other, etc.) but times a thousand.

If you rent this movie, you must watch the hour-long documentary on the DVD. It takes you inside the real slums, shows interviews with real gang members. It's unreal.

Before I go, I tried to find the slums on Google Maps (I wanted to see how close I could get; dorky, I know) and guess what I found in the picture? Here it is. Look below the arrow, to the left:


Do you see it? Here's a closer look:


And still closer:


It's a plane! A plane! (I feel like Tattoo.)

I've never seen a plane in a Google Maps search before. I thought it was really neat.