Puppy Purses

This is wrong. Just wrong.

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Didn't I See You on Cops?

I got an email recently from a college roommate of mine, a girl I haven't talked to in ten years. This is what it said, and this is all it said:

"Did I see you and Pearce tonight on Cops Las Vegas? Just wondering... Hope your doing well. Tanya"

Hmmm... is it just me, or is it inappropriate to ask someone you haven't spoken to or seen in over ten years if they were on Cops?

She sent the email via savekaryn.com, so she obviously heard about the website/book, but she didn't address it, or write her last name on the email, or remind me who she was like, "Hey remember me? We lived together our freshman year. How have you been?" No. All she said was, "Did I see you on Cops?"

I didn't watch the episode, so I wasn't sure why she thought my friend Pearce and I were on, so I called a different friend who did watch and asked why someone would think we were. When I did, he started laughing and said, "The only people she could've possibly thought you were is a couple who got caught buying crystal meth from a gas station attendant in Vegas."

Yes... Vegas... crystal meth... gas stations attendant.

What the hell is wrong with this girl??? My friend Pearce went on to get his masters degree, designed a lamp that was in a book and exhibited in a museum, and was on Martha Stewart Living once. As for me, I know I've had some finacial problems in the past, but I'm writing my second book right now. WE AREN'T METH HEADS. I was so offended by the email that I wanted to send a rude reply back, but I didn't. I was nice and tried to make light of the situation instead:

"No. We weren't on Cops. Ha ha ha. I didn't see it, what happened??? It makes me worried you would think it was us though... those people can be quite tragic. How are you?"

I was expecting her response to be something along the lines of "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be insulting, yada, yada, yada," but this is what I got:

"Hey Girl, What's up Karyn, I had Cops on in the background (I never watch Cops!) and I heard a guy who reminded me of Pearce. I have not seen or spoken to him since College but as soon as I heard this voice, I looked up and saw a guy who did look like him. I kept watching this scene, and then it shows his friend (who could of been your double). It was crazy, I truly thought it was you both:) Anyway, I'm doing great. Still here in Chicago. Glad to see your doing well! Let me know next time you in town!”

She could have been my double? She seriously said that after I pointed out the people on the show can be quite tragic?

Bitch.

Tanya, I'm not gonna call you next time I'm in Chicago and I'm insulted that you thought I was on Cops. It's incredibly rude to say that to someone EVEN IF YOU THINK IT'S TRUE.

If anyone taped Cops Las Vegas, can get a screen capture of it, or a clip, please send it to me, I'm dying to see my meth smoking/shooting/sniffing (I don't even know how you do meth) double. Also, leave COMMENTS... what's the rudest thing someone's said to you?

20 Times a Lady is Finished!

Welcome to my new blog. Sorry for the absence. I've been very busy writing my new book, "Twenty Times a Lady," and am happy to announce it's finally done. Yay! Exhale.

I've been like a zombie, holed up in my apartment, finishing it. Seriously. The most exciting part of my days has been going to Rite-Aid, deciding what snacks I should get...

"Should I get regular Diet Coke or Diet Coke with Lime?"
"Should I get Jujubees or Jujyfruits?"
"Or should I live on the wild side and get Dots?"

I wish I could say I'm kidding... Anyway, now that it's finally done, I'm hoping my life will get more exciting.